Sunday, February 8, 2009
When I was single, with no kids, and living alone; I gave myself permission to take care of myself. I wrote in a journal every morning, listening to the voice of my ego with all of its complaints and fears. I also tuned into all of my dreams and desires. I took time to nourish my Soul. I went for long walks by the river, sat on a favorite rock by the flowing water, listening for answers from my Higher Self and Higher Power.
Well over a decade, a husband, and several children later, I look back on that amazing period wondering what I did with all of my time. Now it seems I sometimes have to work at giving myself permission to take the special time for myself that I value so much. But, as I sat in the sauna tonight, after my Pilates workout, I realized again the miraculous way life works, and the great gift I have in my husband, my Spiritual Partner.
In my Beloved I have discovered a tool for some of the deepest personal development and healing work I could ever have imagined. Just before he and I met, I was questioning in my journalings, “what helps people heal?” (I was working as a case manager, group therapist, and program coordinator for a psychiatric treatment facility at the time). I have found my answer. I have explored many different healing modalities over the past 16 years, and have witnessed that our committed relationships provide us the opportunity for some of the deepest growth. In my husband, I have a mirror. It’s so easy for me to get angry with him, to blame him, to see what he “should” be doing. I can react to what he does, and feel completely justified in my anger. But, then I’m stuck. We have a power struggle, and I miss out on the beautiful opportunity to grow and evolve. And, oh, how I am in awe of our potential for growth as Spiritual Beings.
I love watching my children grow and develop on the physical plane. “Look how much you grew last night,” I often exclaim, as my son checks to see where his head reaches against my height. And, oh, how I love to notice how much my husband has grown when he catches himself reacting to something I’ve triggered in him and take responsibility for his emotions. To experience him respond instead of react in one of his predictable patterns is fantastic. To observe myself step out of a reaction and see that he is mirroring some aspect of me that is coming up to heal; this nourishes my Soul. I feel so grateful to have listened to my Inner Voice and have chosen a profession that allows me to be a guide and facilitator to others as they evolve and grow.
I wish for you the gift of Healing and encourage you to Nourish Your Soul.
Catherine maintains a private practice in Atlanta, GA conducting individual, couple, and group sessions. She co-founded Life Wellness & Chiropractic, PC, a wellness center offering a variety of healing and personal development services. Visit http://drergas.com/